My Love, My Destroyer
I'm not like other girls, I told you time and time again. You grinned and drew me closer, eyes burning like hot coal.
”I know”, you whispered in my ear, your voice slithering through my ribs to my side, making me giggle and squirm in your embrace.
”No, really, listen...” But you never did, and I was too dazed by your presence to continue. We had better things to do. We always had.
I knew you were dangerous, from the first moment I laid my eyes on you. You stood there behind the bar, with your devilish grin and intense eyes, doing miraculous tricks with booze bottles like it was nothing. And for you, I guess it was. You were amazingly talented in the most bizarre things. Like that time you calmed an infuriated elk while backpacking. You had extra talents not granted for regular humans. It always seemed to me you were too good for this world. Too good to be true.
I was so enthralled by you I didn't notice the signs. The little things I should have noticed, those things which burned like neon signs if I'd just taken a little bit of time to see. I should have run like hell at the first sight of them, but you had already enchanted me so completely, I'm sure I would have ignored them even if I'd noticed.
But then, it was already too late.
You told me it was a surprise. I couldn't help but laugh when you blindfolded me. Helped me to get to your car and played the music so loud while driving, I couldn't hear where we were going. I held your hand, and you squeezed it back so hard it felt a tiny bit uncomfortable. But I didn't say anything. You were so sweet.
You lifted me down from your pick-up, like in old movies, holding me from my waist. I felt the breeze catch my hair and tug it the way breezes do. You took my hand and led me carefully up a gentle slope. I could hear the tall grass whisper its ancient secrets to anyone willing to listen.
”We are here”, you whispered in my ear, sending shivers through my body, and in one smooth sweep, you removed the blindfold. Your smile was the most disarming thing I'd ever seen, nervous and excited at the same time. I felt my heart clench, something big was shuttering it, changing its core. I should have known. I should have known right then and there.
We were standing under a great big oak, its huge roots forming natural shallow walls in all directions. There was a picnic cloth placed between two of the biggest roots, a basket, a wine bottle and all of my favorite food items scattered on the cloth.
I couldn't speak. Something was blocking my throat. I tried to swallow it down but it refused to budge. My heart seemed way too big for my chest. It was burning. I was sure it would burst through my ribcage. What a spectacle that would have been. The thought made me smile and I could finally breathe again.
Through the tears in my eyes, I saw your face getting solemn. You caressed my cheek and pressed your forehead against mine.
”I love you”
It was barely a whisper. It could have been a trick of the wind, a murmur of the tall grass. But it wasn't. It blasted through every cell of my body with a force of an atom bomb.
The burn, the burn of my heart. It was too much. I had to crouch a little, it hurt so much. All I could do was wail in agony. I saw tiny crevices form on top of my skin, an orange burn shine through, spread and open great canyons of pain, sizzling rivers of agony.
The blazing glow was reflected in your horrified eyes. You didn't know what was going on. How could you have known? You could only watch what was happening to me.
My mortal body was burned alive, I was sent back home. Home to the pits of fire. This was my punishment. I wasn't allowed this happiness, of course I wasn't. I was never to be truly happy. Demons never were.
